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June 2007 Archives
Say It Ain't So
Paris Hilton: I'm not, like, that smart.
--Blender Magazine
Except for Packing Thighs and Sporting Shitty Highlights
Kelly Clarkson: I am a good singer, so I can't possibly be a good writer. Women can't possibly be good at two things.
Shout-out: cnn.com
Now That's Cosmic Intervention
Pamela Anderson: Both sides of my family are all in Mensa. It skipped me.
Shout-out: contactmusic.com
Can't Wait to Contribute to the Yellow Thaw Like a Real Man
Tea Leoni: I'm getting a penis in early spring, so that will be interesting.
Shout-out: thesun.co.uk
What Have You Done for Jesus Lately?
Bridget Moynahan, on meeting the pope: I went up there and I just went blank, so I bent down, licked his hand, and went off.
But I Am Willing to Be a Martyr for My Own Self-righteousness
Kelly Clarkson: My point of view is that I shouldn't be a mother at all, because I'd be horrible. I'm not willing to be that selfless.
Shout-out: cnn.com
Except for the Knives... But They Fall Off
Jerry Seinfeld: Bees have the only perfect society on Earth. They have no crime, they have no drugs, they have no rape... A little rape, but it's not that bad.
Shout-out: nydailynews.com
Urban Dictionary Begs to Differ
Bobby Brown: The reason why I tried to kill that man is because he spat on me. That's the dirtiest thing you can do to a man.
How Humble Of You
Jessica Alba: I always felt like I was born into the wrong family. I didn't feel I belonged, and I felt that I should have been royal, and nobody knew that except me.
Shout-out: dailymail.co.uk
Say Hello to My Little Friend: Tights
Al Pacino: All due respect and trying to be as modest as I can be, I am a dancer.
Shout-out: femalefirst.co.uk
'Til It Trickles on Out, Anyway
Jon Bon Jovi: Whatever goes on in Bon Jovi stays in Bon Jovi.
Shout-out: dailymail.co.uk
Not Even Me
Madonna: There's, like, no books about anything.
Instead Of Under My Hangnails
George Clooney: If I were as famous as some of those kids who are on the magazines right now at 21 years old, I'd be shooting crack under my eyeball.
Shout-out: ew.com
... Than Should Hear Me Speak
Christina Aguilera: I give money to a company that makes hearing aids. More people should hear me sing.
... Of the Earth
Annie Lennox: A concert such as this really helps to put the world on the map.
--Press conference after concert, Norway
Overheard by: Woozy
Aw, You Shouldn't Have!
Paula Abdul: I'm tired of people not treating me like the gift that I am.
Shout-out: nydailynews.com
Categories: Paula Abdul | Singers | Posted 2007-06-11 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Starting in About 36 Days
Paris Hilton: In the future, I plan on taking more of an active role in the decisions I make.
Shout-out: thesuperficial.com
It's All in the Wrist
John Mayer: I've realized you can use a fork as a spoon if you use it rapidly enough.
Shout-out: usmagazine.com
Like Daisies and Sunshine
Natalie Portman: Oh my god! I'm not black, but I know what it feels like!
Shout-out: en.wikipedia.org
Overheard by: genny
Fighting the War on Gender Differentiation One Speech at a Time
George W. Bush: Karyn is with us -- a west Texas girl, just like me.
Shout-out: whitehouse.gov
Overheard by: c.j.
Wouldn't Want Jesus to Think I'm Tacky
Billy Bob Thornton: I quit flying years ago. I don't want to die with tourists.
Overheard by: supafly
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