Something That Doesn't Exist Can't Be Eaten

Joaquin phoenix: Do I have a large frog in my hair? Something’s crawling out of my scalp. No, but I mean I feel it. I’m not worried about the looks, I’m worried about the sensation of my brain being eaten.

Overheard by: krabby patty

Diarrhea Is So In This Year

Anjelica Huston on India: And the best part is you can lose weight after just one meal.


Well, Why the Hell Not?

Porn star Mary Carey: One day I plan on running for President of the United States.

–Vh1’s Celebrity Rehab, Episode 1

Overheard by: e dawg

Starting in About 36 Days

Paris Hilton: In the future, I plan on taking more of an active role in the decisions I make.


I Go for the Latte and Pussy Buffets

Simon Cowell: It’s very fashionable to be in rehab.